Cipralex Day 10

It has been a rough morning so far, and it is only 8:21 am.  Oy.

I didn't sleep well last night - more heart racing.  Hubby is also not sleeping well, which is making me worry and panic for him.  I don't want him to turn into me!

No headache yet today, and my jaw doesn't hurt, but I did have some bright circley spots appearing this morning when I was laying in bed with my eyes shut.  I've read about brain zaps as a side effect...I'm not sure if this was that, but maybe.

I am irritable, however.  My youngest son has phlegm problems and the cough-hork thing he does is grossing me out.  My middle son is biting his nails and the sound is making me incredibly tense, and my oldest son is going through a stage where he fake cries and makes noises like he is choking and suffocating when he gets upset.  These noises make me stressed and anxious and annoyed because I really feel like the way that he is acting, but I can't go around acting like that.

My daughter is really needy lately.  Unfortunately, I've been not really up to doing much with her, so there is a lot of afternoon TV watching going on for her.  Also, though, we've had much more time to cuddle,  she has done some crafts with me, and we've played with her dollhouse collection twice this week, which I have not done a lot of in the past.  I am realizing that I have no idea how to play.

I am trying to take it easy, but I don't know if that is the right thing to do!

Wondering if I should go back to 2.5mg of Cipralex after a friend told me about pill splitters.  I don't want to make things worse for myself, but I feel unsure about needing the med.  I am still in the adjustment stage and I am thinking that if I make the change now rather than later it would be easier on my body.

I forced down half of a cinnamon raisin bagel with cream cheese for breakfast this morning even though I felt like vomiting the whole time I made it and the whole time I ate it.  Yesterday I made it up to almost 1800 calories, even though I cheated a little with a Froster.  I am aiming for 2000 calories a day right now.  I hope that I will get there soon!  I am intrigued that actually consuming regular sized meals is creating nice sized BMs.  Way TMI, but isn't that what this blog is about?


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